apathy is the emotional state of not being able to answer the question "what you do want to do?" (on any timescale). it is intense angst. it is going to sleep to avoid thinking. it is believing there is nothing to do because nothing is compelling. nothing is appealing. you just lay in the feather bed. you just lay there. apathy.
i hate it.
so then why all this? because apathy is real and by trying to capture it perhaps i have come to understand it better.